


Easy to Assemble

by perry_avenue



Category: Glee
Genre: Klaine, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-02
Updated: 2016-08-02
Packaged: 2018-07-28 17:37:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,241
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7650157
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/perry_avenue/pseuds/perry_avenue
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Post-wedding, Kurt and Blaine visit Ikea for the first time.</p><p>Based on this prompt: <i>Post-wedding, Kurt and Blaine go to Ikea for the first time. They have very different opinions on what is a bargain and what looks good in their apartment, so there is some fun banter. Author can also expand to them trying to put together a couple pieces once they get home, but that isn't necessary.</i></p><p>Written for the 2016 TDB Fic Gift Exchange</p>
            </blockquote>





	Easy to Assemble

**Author's Note:**

  * For [spinmybowtie](https://archiveofourown.org/users/spinmybowtie/gifts).



> The 2016 TDB Fic Gift Exchange is a good excuse for me to write something that is _not_ part of the _Sweet DREAMers_ ‘verse. So here, have a much more canon-compliant Klaine, thanks to a great prompt from [ Spinmybowtie ](http://archiveofourown.org/users/spinmybowtie/pseuds/spinmybowtie) I hope you like your gift!
> 
> My thanks to my fabulous beta and dear friend, [flowerfan ](http://archiveofourown.org/users/flowerfan/pseuds/flowerfan)
> 
> Special thanks to the lovely folks at [ todaydreambelievers ](http://todaydreambelievers.tumblr.com/) who work so hard to keep the Glee Fandom engaged, and continue to promote the music, the episodes, and especially, the fanfic. You’re awesome!
> 
> Follow me on [ Tumblr ](http://perryavenue.tumblr.com)  
> 
> 
>   
> Note: The nearest Ikea store is many, many miles away from where I live. I did quite a bit of on-line research, but you Ikea fans out there will see where I’ve taken a few liberties with the shopping experience for the sake of the narrative. Please don’t judge me. 

*****

_It’s a Saturday in late June, more than six months after Kurt and Blaine’s wedding. They have moved into a tiny apartment in lower Manhattan while attending NYADA and NYU._

Blaine stepped out of the bedroom, showered and dressed for the day. Kurt was right where he had left him half an hour ago, sitting at the kitchen table, scrolling through his laptop. 

Blaine tucked his yellow polo into his tailored Bermuda shorts. “I just need five more minutes.”

Kurt hummed absently and kept scrolling.

“Kurt?”

“What?” Kurt looked up to see Blaine smiling at him. “Five minutes and we can go,” Blaine repeated.

Kurt nodded. “I’m ready. I was just looking at all the things on sale at Ikea.”

“Did you find something nice for us?”

“I think so.” Kurt turned his laptop around so Blaine could see the screen. “What do you think of this shelf unit? It’s on sale for $44.99. The regular price is $89.99.”

  


[ Source: Ikea Kallax shelf unit.](http://www.ikea.com/us/en/catalog/products/80278838/#/80278838)

Blaine sat down next to Kurt to take a closer look. He liked the design, but the color, not so much. “It’s very red,” he said carefully.

“I know,” Kurt nodded happily. “I love that pop of color. It’ll look great in our bedroom, and I checked the dimensions while you were in the shower. It’ll fit that one space against the wall perfectly.”

Blaine had a feeling he was going to lose on this one, but he decided to try one more time. “But it’s not going to match anything.”

“Blaine, we don’t need it to be matchy-matchy. It’ll be a nice contrast to everything else.” Kurt paused and frowned. “But if you really hate it…”

“No, no,” Blaine replied quickly. This was not actually something he wanted to argue about. He was sure he could live with a red bookcase, especially since it offered lots of storage. God knows, given their tiny apartment, they needed all the shelf space they could get. “I don’t hate it. And the price is perfect. Under fifty dollars is a steal. If you think the color will work in our bedroom, I trust you.”

Kurt smiled, looking a bit relieved, and leaned over to kiss Blaine on the cheek. “Thank you, sweetie. You’ll like it, I promise.“

Blaine took Kurt’s hand, gave it a squeeze and looked at him with an earnest expression on his face. ”But we do need to watch what we spend today. You know how much you love to shop. You’re amazing at finding bargains, but with our tight budget, we can’t go too crazy.”

“Not to worry,” Kurt assured him. “I will be the model of self-control.” Kurt leaned away from Blaine, who released his hand, and stretched his arms behind his head. “Ooh. I’m a little stiff from sitting so long.“ Blaine unashamedly admired the view. 

Kurt caught Blaine staring, grinned, and stood up, looking very cool and comfortable in a pale blue v neck tee shirt and tan shorts. “Uh-uh. I can see what you’re thinking.” 

Blaine mock pouted. “Is it a bad thing for me to think that my sexy husband is sexy?”

Kurt preened at the compliment. “Not at all, but we have a full day ahead of us. We need to go.”

Blaine shook his head slightly to clear his mind of imagining Kurt naked on their bed. Sexy times would have to wait. He frowned momentarily. “A full day? I thought we’re just going there to get the shelf unit.”

“Yes, and any other cool things within our budget. But neither of us has ever been there, so we owe it to ourselves to check it out thoroughly.”

Blaine kissed Kurt lightly on the lips. “Okay, husband. Lead the way.” 

Kurt reached for Blaine’s hand as they headed out the door.

*****  
It was a warm and sunny June day, so not surprisingly, the subway station was stifling when Kurt and Blaine reached the platform. But the train arrived quickly, and they were only too happy to feel the air conditioning as the car doors slid open. They had decided to include a lunch stop and a visit to the nearby piers as part of their trip to the Ikea store, located in the Red Hook section of Brooklyn.

They changed trains at the City Hall stop. Once the subway left Manhattan and entered the first Brooklyn station, Kurt turned to Blaine. “So we’re back in Brooklyn.”

Blaine shrugged. “We don’t come here much since we moved. Do you miss it?”

“No. We weren’t our best here.” Kurt paused and squeezed Blaine’s hand. “We’re in such a better place now.” Blaine smiled, knowing Kurt meant a lot more than just their Manhattan apartment. 

“Oh, I saw something else on the Ikea web site that I liked.”

“Kurt!”

“Now don’t get excited. It’s a can opener and it’s under ten dollars.”

“Kurt, we have a perfectly fine can opener.”

“Not like this one. Wait ‘til you see it.”

Blaine sighed. He had a feeling that the can opener was just the tip of the iceberg.

*****  
Kurt tugged on Blaine’s arm as the subway pulled into the Court Street -Borough Hall station. “It’s our stop. There’s a free shuttle bus from here to Ikea every half hour.” They exited to the street and located the bus stop outside the station. They joined the end of a fairly long line.

“It’s a good sign,” Blaine said as he glanced around. “With so many people here, there probably hasn’t been a bus in a while. We won’t have a long wait.”

Just as Blaine finished speaking, an Ikea shuttle bus turned the corner.

“Perfect timing,” said Kurt.

Once they found seats on the bus, Kurt checked his phone. “Oh, good. It’s only 11:15 am. By the time the bus drops us off and we walk to Defonte’s, it’ll be lunchtime!”

“Is that the restaurant you told me about?”

Kurt nodded. “They’re supposed to have fabulous sandwiches. They don’t take credit cards, so I made sure to bring some extra cash.”

“Sounds great. We didn’t eat much for breakfast, and we should be fortified before braving Ikea.” Blaine glanced out the window at the sky before continuing. “It’s so nice out.”

“We could bring our lunch down to the pier next to Ikea, and enjoy the view while we eat.” 

Blaine smiled at Kurt. “You’ve really researched this, haven’t you?”

Kurt shrugged in response. Blaine gave him a quick kiss on the cheek. “I guess we’re making a day of it after all.”

Once the shuttle dropped them off at Ikea, Kurt consulted his phone’s maps app. “It’s just a fifteen minute walk to Defonte’s.”

“Lead the way,” said Blaine.

When they reached the popular restaurant, there were six customers ahead of them, waiting to give their orders. Kurt’s eyes widened when he saw the size of the sandwiches being made. “Oh my god. Those are huge!”

Blaine nodded. “They really are. Do you want to share one?”

Kurt shook his head. “No way. I’m starving. But maybe we could each order something different and share half?”

“Works for me.” Blaine looked at the menu. “Everything looks good. What are you thinking of getting?”

“The potato, egg and mozzarella hero sounds weird, but it got a really good write up on Yelp. I think I’m going to try it, along with something to drink. What about you?”

“I wouldn’t have thought to get it, but if the reviews are good, I’m game. If I get the eggplant parmesan hero, will you eat it?”

“Absolutely,” Kurt said as he pulled Blaine against him for a quick one arm hug. “What would you like to drink? Diet Coke okay?”

“Sure. “

Once they had gotten their lunch, Kurt and Blaine retraced their steps to Ikea and followed the path to the nearby pier and esplanade. They found a bench and sat down, facing Upper New York Bay, which fed into the East River. The Statue of Liberty was in the distance, and further north, the Manhattan skyline. The breeze coming off the water kept them comfortable. They ate with gusto while boats of all sizes passed in front of them. A water taxi pulled up to the pier and discharged a number of passengers.

“That is so cool,” Blaine exclaimed. “Could we have taken that here?”

“Actually, I looked it up. it’s free on weekends. It leaves from Pier 11 in Manhattan, near Wall Street. I think the one that just docked is the first taxi of the day, but it wouldn’t have worked out. They have size limits on what you’re allowed to bring aboard after you shop. The shelf unit wouldn’t have fit.”

“Oh, that’s too bad. On a day like this, it would be fun to take a water taxi.”

“I know! Maybe next time, when we’re not shopping for something so big.”

Blaine finished his sandwich and licked his fingers before folding up the wrapping paper. He sighed happily. “That sandwich was amazing. I’m stuffed. I don’t think we’ll have to make a big dinner tonight.”

“I know. I’m full, too.”

Blaine leaned back against the bench, placed his head on Kurt’s shoulder and looked out on the water. “Kurt, this is perfect. I wouldn’t mind if we spent the rest of the day right here.”

Kurt laughed and squeezed Blaine’s thigh. “It IS a pretty spot. But there’s a shelf unit inside Ikea with our name on it. I don’t plan on leaving without it!”

Blaine nuzzled Kurt’s neck and sat up. “So does that mean it’s time to commence shopping?”

Kurt grinned as he pulled Blaine to his feet. “It does! Let’s dump our garbage and let the games begin!”

  


Picture of Ikea Brooklyn Exterior 

[ Source ](http://blog.froy.com/furniture-stores-in-nyc-12-best-shops-for-modern-designs/)

*****  
As they entered Ikea, Kurt and Blaine were amazed at how vast it was. There was aisle after aisle of furniture and home goods. There were numerous model living rooms, bed rooms, kitchens, and bath rooms. There was also a café and a place for kids. It was easily one of the biggest retail spaces they had ever been to anywhere in New York City. Just inside the entrance, there were notepads and pencils to write down price tag information, and stacks of large yellow bags to use in the store for carry out items. Blaine took a notepad and pencil, and Kurt took one of the yellow bags. “Just in case,” he explained when he caught Blaine judging him.

They walked by the café entrance, and Blaine touched Kurt’s arm. “You’re not sorry we didn’t eat here, are you?”

“Not at all. Nothing could be as good as those sandwiches from Defonte’s.”

“You can say that again.”

“Look,” Kurt said, nodding towards a banner hung from the rafters. It read “Ikea Family Appreciation Days.”

“What’s that?”

“That’s their loyalty program, the one I joined so we could get the sale price on the shelf unit. It’s called ‘Ikea Family.’ They have reduced prices for members.”

Blaine grinned. “And I know how much you like sales.”

“Exactly.”

Blaine was ready to move on. “Why don’t we go take a look at the shelf unit?”

Kurt took Blaine’s hand. “Sounds like a plan.”

They stopped to ask a sales clerk for directions, and started walking towards the shelf units displays. The walk took them past the housewares section, filled with small, colorful items for the kitchen.

“Ooh,” Blaine exclaimed, stopping to take a look. “Kurt, we should check this out!”

“Says the man who wanted to go straight to the shelving section and watch our pennies,” Kurt replied, highly amused. 

“But you said you wanted a can opener.”

“I know, but let’s look at the shelving display first, and then we can come back here.”

“Okay, you’re right,” said Blaine, allowing Kurt to lead him away from the housewares section, but not without a final look over his shoulder.

A few steps later, they came upon some large bins filled with throw pillows of all shapes, colors and sizes, marked for clearance. Blaine stopped again. 

“Ooh, look at the colors!”

Kurt could barely suppress a giggle. “Blaine honey, you have to stop staring at all the pretty things!”

Blaine mock pouted. “But wouldn’t it be nice to add a pop of color to our living room, just like we’re adding a pop of color to the bedroom?”

Kurt was delighted by Blaine’s unexpected enthusiasm. “I can see you’ve gone over to the dark side. We’ll come back here, too. I promise.”

They finally made it to the shelving display, where there were a number of options in a range of sizes, shapes and colors. Kurt found the one he had seen on-line. He and Blaine examined it carefully. Kurt paid especially close attention to how it was put together, and took several pictures of it from various angles with his phone.

Blaine attempted to pick the unit up. He let out his breath with a soft “oof” and turned to Kurt. “This is pretty heavy. Are you sure we can get this home by ourselves?”

“I think so. I mean, we can try to lift it together when we go to check out, and see what we think. You don’t want to have it delivered, though.”

“Why not?”

“Because the delivery charge is $99 to Manhattan. That’s more than double the cost of the unit!”

“Yikes,” said Blaine. “You’re right. We’re not doing that.” Blaine paused while he looked at it again. “Well, we are strong.”

“We are,” Kurt agreed. “I think the two of us can manage to get it on board the shuttle bus, and then on the subway. It comes unassembled in a long flat box. I brought a couple of bungee cords in my bag. We can wrap them around each end and it’ll be easier to carry.”

Blaine’s eyes widened. “You think of everything, don’t you?” 

“Well, I try.”

“How hard will it be to assemble?” Blaine asked.

“It won’t be too bad. All the parts come with it. Plus, I’m one of those people who actually bothers to read the instructions before starting. I think we’re fine.”

“So, we’re taking it?”

Kurt nodded. “As long as you agree.”

Blaine looked at the unit closely one more time. “Now that I see it, I really like the color and the design. It feels very solid. Nice job, husband.” 

Kurt beamed and gave Blaine a quick kiss on the cheek. “Thank you, husband. Give me your pad. I’ll write down the information from the price tag. Then we can head back to the pillows and housewares.”

“Don’t forget the showrooms. I’d love to look at some of the furniture displays. For the larger apartment we’ll have someday.”

Kurt smiled softly. “Oh, sweetie. I would, too.”

*****  
Two hours later, Kurt and Blaine had checked out at least fifteen different model rooms. They had filled the yellow bag with four colorful pillows, the can opener Kurt had liked, and four additional kitchen gadgets that Blaine insisted were “must haves, especially at these prices.” Blaine made sure to remind Kurt of the amount they had planned to spend on the shelves, and how the sale price was actually $50 less. So, Blaine reasoned, they could certainly buy some new things on sale with the money they had saved. 

Kurt smiled happily, kissed Blaine on the cheek, and said affectionately, “I think I’ve created a monster. Let’s pick up the shelf unit and check out.” 

Blaine took a flat cart from the self-serve section while Kurt looked for their shelf unit, consulting the inventory number he had written down earlier. “I found it!” Kurt called.

Blaine pushed the cart over to Kurt and together, they lifted the carton off the shelf and onto the cart’s platform. “Good thing the box is less than five feet long,” said Blaine. “Last thing we need is one that’s taller than we are.”

Blaine pushed the cart to the check out area. They found the shortest line, and it took only a few minutes before it was their turn.

“Do you have an Ikea Family card?” asked the cashier. 

“Yes, I do,“ Kurt replied, and proudly showed the image of his Ikea Family membership card on his phone.

The cashier scanned the image, and waited while Kurt slid his credit card into the chip viewer. She placed two large plastic bags, each holding half the pillows and kitchen hardware, atop the carton containing the shelf unit. “Do you need any help with your order?”

Kurt was about to shake his head “no” when he thought of something. “You wouldn’t happen to have handles that I could attach to the bungee cords, would you?”

The cashier nodded. “Actually, we do. There’s a section along the wall to your right. You’ll find tape, string, handles and other items to secure your packages.”

“Amazing,” Blaine exclaimed. “Thank you so much!”

Once they located the free handles, which were made of wood with metal hooks on either end, Kurt took two bungee cords out of his messenger bag, and wrapped each one twice around the carton’s width, positioning them on either end. He secured one handle in between the two wrapped lengths of the first bungee cord, and then repeated the process with the second one. He had Blaine lift the carton with one handle while he did the same with the other. Blaine could feel the bungee cord straining under the weight, which had to be forty pounds between them. He wondered if they should carry it differently, but the carton was too wide for him and Kurt to put it under their arms. 

“What do you think?” Blaine asked.

“I don’t think we have a choice,” Kurt replied. “No pain, no gain.”

“I don’t suppose you would consider a taxi instead of the bus and subway?”

“Maybe. Although the fare from here will be ridiculous. Let’s see how far we can get before we throw in the towel and spend a lot of money.” Kurt paused and grinned. “We’ll make it a competition! See who tires first.”

Blaine grinned back. All his working out was about to pay off big time. “You’re on!”

It took a fair amount of coordination for Kurt and Blaine to exit the store. Kurt led the way, holding his end of the carton by the handle hooked to the bungee cord, with Blaine behind him, holding the other end up by the second handle. They each carried an Ikea bag in their other hand, containing their remaining purchases. Despite the weight of the carton, they were determined to power their way out of the store and over to the shuttle stop. 

A bus was waiting, with its lower storage compartments open, so passengers could store their large purchases before boarding the bus. Kurt and Blaine put their bags on the sidewalk while they maneuvered the carton into one of the compartments. Then they picked them up and got on board.

“That went fairly well,” Blaine commented as they and the rest of the passengers found seats.

Kurt flexed the fingers of his right hand. “I just wish the handle had some padding on it. We should have brought gloves.”

Blaine patted him on the arm. “The numbness will go away just in time for us to carry it down the stairs into the subway station.”

“That ought to be fun.” Kurt couldn’t keep the sarcasm out of his voice.

Blaine squeezed his arm in sympathy. “But like you said, we’re saving a ton of money by not having it delivered. We can do this, Kurt.”

“The power of positive thinking,” Kurt replied.

“Exactly.”

*****  
Fifteen minutes later, the shuttle bus pulled up to the Court Street – Borough Hall subway station. Once Kurt and Blaine took the carton out of the bus’s storage compartment, they stood together on the sidewalk, discussing strategy. Blaine was trying to figure out the best way to get the carton into the subway.

“We have to go down two flights of stairs before we reach the platform for the Manhattan trains,” Blaine explained. “Should we carry the carton between the two of us, like we did when we left Ikea, or should just one of us take it down the stairs, holding it vertically?”

“It’s really heavy,” Kurt replied. “Do you think one of us can manage it down two flights of stairs?”

“Maybe there’s an elevator.” Blaine pulled his phone out of his pocket and opened his MTA App. He selected “Accessible Transit” and scrolled down to the Brooklyn listing. “Here we go. This station has an elevator in front of the Supreme Court Building at Court and Montague Streets. It serves the northbound trains, and that’s the direction we’re headed.” He looked up triumphantly at Kurt, who smiled back.

“This could work!” Kurt exclaimed.

Blaine checked his GPS app. “We’re on Court Street, and the Supreme Court Building is this way.” He nodded in the direction they needed to go. “Let’s do this!”

They picked up the carton by the handles, and walked up the street towards the elevator entrance. Now that they were some distance from the waterfront, there was less of a breeze and the temperature felt hotter. They were both sweating by the time they reached the elevator, and were relieved to find that it was working. They had the elevator to themselves and there was plenty of room, but the smell inside was pretty awful. Blaine tried not to look at the wet stains in the far corner. 

“Oh, god,” Kurt groaned. “What’s wrong with using a bathroom? When Sue locked us in that elevator at McKinley, we literally ate off the floor. It was that clean.”

“That wasn’t a real elevator,” Blaine replied. “Just close your nose and breathe through your mouth. This is still better than the stairs.”

They rode two levels down to the northbound subway platform, and paused at the turnstiles while they figured out the best way to maneuver the carton through the opening. Kurt held it vertically while Blaine swiped his Metro card and passed through the turnstile first with the two Ikea bags, then put them on the ground. He turned around to face Kurt, who bit his lip, bent his knees and using both hands, power-lifted the carton up and over the turnstile towards Blaine. Once Blaine had a firm grip on it and set it down, Kurt swiped his Metro card and joined him. 

Blaine smiled. “Nicely done! “

Kurt shrugged his shoulders a couple of times to stretch his back muscles. “I’m glad we’re not trying to do this during rush hour,” grateful for the relative emptiness of the subway station late on a Saturday afternoon. 

“I just hope the subway’s not too crowded,” Blaine replied. “We’re going to need to stand this up once we’re inside.”

They picked up the carton by the handles again, and walked down the platform to get closer to the tracks. Once they found a good spot to wait, Blaine handed his Ikea bag to Kurt, and tipped the carton so he could hold it vertically. Ten minutes later, the Manhattan-bound number 4 subway pulled into the station. Blaine was relieved to see that it wasn’t very full. When the doors opened, he lifted the carton up a few inches to clear the lip of the subway car floor, sat down in a nearby empty seat, and held the carton in front of him with both hands. Kurt took the seat next to him, and put the Ikea bags between his legs.

“We did it!” Kurt exclaimed, as the doors closed and the train pulled out of the station.

Blaine leaned to one side so he could see past the carton to the electronic subway map above the window opposite his seat. “It’s four stops to City Hall. That’s where we need to change to the 6 train. That’ll be easy. We just have to walk across the platform.” Blaine reached for his phone to check the MTA app. “Once we get to our stop, we can take the escalator or the elevator to the street.”

“I don’t mind taking the escalator this time. I’m happy to hold the carton on it.” 

Blaine smiled. “You just don’t want to get in a smelly elevator again.”

Kurt nodded. “You’re right. Not if there’s another option!”

When they reached the City Hall station, Blaine carried the carton across the platform so they could change to the number 6 subway. The train pulled in a few minutes later, and again Blaine lifted the carton so it would clear the subway car floor. Once they found seats, Blaine held the carton vertically in front of him, while Kurt took charge of the bags. 

Blaine turned to Kurt. “The last hurdle is the four block walk to our apartment, and then the two flights upstairs. Thoughts?”

Kurt wrinkled his forehead while he considered their options. “We could take a taxi from the station to the apartment.”

“We could.”

“Or we could power through it for four blocks.”

“But it’s hot out, and we’ll still have the two flights of stairs at the end.”

“True,” Kurt agreed. “What’s your preference?”

“We’ve been so virtuous taking the subway home and saving money today with all the sales, let’s spring for the taxi. It should be under ten dollars. Then we won’t be too exhausted to tackle the stairs.”

Kurt squeezed Blaine’s arm. “Let’s do it.”

They got off at the Bleeker-Broadway-Lafayette Street station. Kurt successfully navigated the carton up the escalator, while Blaine stood behind him with the Ikea bags, ready to help if needed. When they exited the subway station onto the street, they looked around for a taxi. The first one to stop was a Prius, so with the driver’s permission, they folded one of the rear seats, opened the rear hatchback, and slid the carton into the car. Kurt took the bags and sat in the back to keep it from shifting, and Blaine took the seat up front with the driver. The air conditioning felt great. They were so relieved to be out of the heat.

They reached their apartment building in less than ten minutes. After paying the driver, Blaine pulled the carton back through the rear hatchback, and stood it vertically on the sidewalk while Kurt unlocked the front door. 

“Do you need me to help with that?” Kurt asked.

“Nope, just let me get it through the door.”

Blaine lifted the carton up two steps, and entered the building while Kurt held the door open. The door clicked shut behind them, and suddenly, the air in the entry way felt very warm and almost suffocating. They looked at the staircase in front of them. It was one of those moments when they both wished the building had an elevator.

“Okay,” said Blaine. “Now comes the fun part. How do you want to do this?”

“It’s too steep a slant for both of us to carry it by the two handles. It’s going to be a one-man job. We’ve got two flights of stairs. Want to take turns?”

“Okay, but if it gets to be too much, we can always switch mid-way on the stairs, too.”

“I’ll go first,” said Kurt. He put the Ikea bags down, and took the carton from Blaine. Kurt took a deep breath, and bent his knees before lifting the carton. He shifted it to the right so he could see in front of him as he slowly mounted the stairs. He started to sweat before he got very far, and paused on the sixth step. “Shit. This is heavy.”

Blaine picked up the bags and followed him. “Don’t strain yourself,” he warned. “There’s no shame in switching off half-way.” 

Kurt shook his head. “I just needed to catch my breath.” He wiped his forehead. “Damn, it’s really hot.” He took another deep breath. “Okay, I’m ready now.” He made it to the first landing. Sweat began to stain the underarms and back of his shirt.

“My turn,” said Blaine. He put the Ikea bags down and took the carton from Kurt. Following Kurt’s example, he stopped half way up, rested briefly, and then continued the rest of the way, sweat dripping from his brow, before carrying the carton down the hall and resting it alongside their apartment door. “Home!” he said, sounding relieved, as he pulled his damp shirt away from his back. He really needed a shower.

Kurt walked up to Blaine and kissed him firmly on the lips. “Great job! Now let’s get this bad boy inside.” 

Kurt unlocked their apartment door, and Blaine carried the carton across the threshold. Kurt put the bags on the floor.

“Do you want it in the bedroom?” Blaine asked.

“Sure, but then let’s have something to drink.”

“A shower sounds like a good idea, too.” Blaine tipped the carton so they both could carry it. Once it was resting against the wall of their bedroom, they returned to the living room so Kurt could turn on the floor fan while Blaine opened the windows to let in fresh air. Their next stop was the kitchen, where Kurt filled two large glasses with ice and water. They eagerly gulped the water down, which Kurt quickly replenished. 

Kurt pushed one of Blaine’s sweaty curls off his forehead and kissed him softly on the lips. “From now on, we only make furniture purchases from places with free delivery.”

“I agree,” said Blaine, returning the kiss. “This was an interesting experience. Let’s not do it ever again.”

“A toast to surviving Ikea,” Kurt said, as he clinked Blaine’s glass with his. 

“To surviving Ikea,” Blaine repeated. “Hey! You said getting the carton home was a competition. Who won?”

Kurt kissed the top of Blaine’s head. “We did.”

Blaine snorted. “That sounds like something Mr. Schue would say.”

Kurt chuckled, and they finished their second glass of water in silence. Blaine spoke first.

“Do you want to wait to put it together until tomorrow?”

Kurt shook his head. “Nope. After all the trouble to get it home, I want to do it today. I think I’ll get my second wind once I shower.”

“So do you want to go first, or shall we share?”

Kurt was focused on their new purchase. “Why don’t you go first? I’ll open up the carton and see what’s what.”

Blaine kissed Kurt on the lips. “Someone must be in major task mode to pass up a shared shower.”

Kurt sighed as he draped his arms over Blaine’s shoulders and nuzzled Blaine’s neck. “I know. What am I thinking? But I just really want to put the thing together. Maybe we can have reward sex when it’s done.“

Blaine pursed his lips together in thought. “Hmmm. Tell me more about this ‘reward sex.’”

Kurt mouthed and licked just behind Blaine’s ear before stepping back. “How about a demonstration later?”

Blaine whined softly. “Not fair!” he complained. 

“Got to get to work now. I promise I’ll make it up to you.”

“I’ll remember you said that.” Blaine was about to go into the bathroom when he thought of something, and turned back to Kurt. 

“I know we don’t want a big dinner, but I could make us a nice salad and cut up some fresh fruit for dessert. I’ll get started on it after I shower, unless the shelf unit is a two person job.”

Kurt nodded. “That sounds perfect. I think I’ll be okay. I’ll holler if I need any help. It really shouldn’t take more than an hour.”

“Well, good luck. I hope you don’t run into any problems.”

Kurt smiled. “Blaine, honey, Dad and I used to take cars apart and put them back together all the time. I’ve got this!”

Blaine bit his lip as he headed into the bathroom. _Famous last words, love,_ he thought to himself.

*****  
While Blaine showered, Kurt pulled out the tool box from the floor of their bedroom closet and found a box cutter. He opened the carton carefully and removed the contents. There were eleven shelf pieces, a small instruction booklet written in multiple languages, and a sealed plastic bag containing long screws, a hex key to tighten them, a wall anchor kit, and wood posts. He examined each shelf piece to make sure none were scratched or otherwise marred. 

Kurt spent a few minutes reading the instruction booklet, and retrieved a small hammer from the tool box. By then, Blaine was out of the shower. He walked into the bedroom with a towel around his waist, his hair still damp but combed through.

“How’s it going so far?” Blaine asked.

“Well, nothing seems to be missing.”

“That’s a good sign.” Blaine took out a thin and well-worn tee shirt, boxer briefs, and some old McKinley gym shorts from the dresser, and put them on.

Kurt took one last look at the instructions, and stood up. “My turn to shower,” he said, pausing to give Blaine a kiss on the cheek. “Back in a bit.”

While Kurt was in the bathroom, Blaine noticed the instructions lying on the bedroom floor and decided to look them over before starting dinner. He glanced at the pieces Kurt had spread out on the floor, and back at the instructions again. It didn’t seem too complicated, but if Kurt needed him for anything, he was ready to help.

As Blaine walked into the kitchen, he passed his iPad sitting on the counter, and turned it on. It wouldn’t hurt to see if there was a video that showed how to assemble their shelf unit. Blaine grinned when one of the choices that came up on his search was “Watch me build an Ikea Kallax bookshelf!“ That was the brand they had bought! The video was just six minutes long. The shelf unit shown was white, but otherwise, it was identical to theirs. He thought Kurt would be fine without the video, but It was good to have a back-up to the written instructions. Blaine opened the refrigerator, and started taking out items for their dinner.

*****  
Blaine was still in the kitchen making the salad when the bathroom door opened. ‘Feeling better?” he called out.

“Fantastic,” Kurt replied as he crossed into their bedroom to get dressed. “I’m ready to tackle the shelves!”

“I found a YouTube ‘how to assemble’ video if you want to see it.”

“Thank you, but I think I’m good.”

“Okay, but I’m right here if you need me.” Blaine reached for a yellow pepper and began slicing it.

Kurt put on a thin v neck tee shirt, boxer briefs and loose cotton drawstring pants to protect his legs from any scratches while he worked on the shelf unit. He sat down on the floor and picked up the instructions. He could hear Blaine singing in the kitchen while he fixed dinner. Kurt smiled appreciatively. He loved to listen to his husband’s beautiful voice.

Kurt selected the bottom piece and one of the side pieces, lining them up at right angles to each other. He inserted two screws into the pre-drilled holes, and using the hex key, tightened them until they were flush with the surface. With a look of total concentration on his face, he methodically picked up each center shelf divider, used the hammer to gently drive the wooden posts into the matching holes, connected the dividers to the interior shelves, and used the hammer to be sure the pieces were tightly joined. 

Once all the dividers were connected to the shelves, Kurt turned the unit so that it rested on its side. He inserted posts into the outer edges of the four interior shelves, and secured them firmly with the hammer. Then he carefully placed the last side piece so that the pre-drilled holes lined up with the posts, and gently pushed down to lock it in place. He inserted the remaining posts in the three edges that would hold the top piece, and gently hammered them in place. He lined up the top piece with the posts, and pushed down gently. Then he inserted the four long screws into each corner and tightened them with the hex key to lock the top in place. 

Kurt stepped back and gave the shelf unit a good look. He had used every post and screw, and he was certain he had assembled it correctly. It looked _exactly_ like the one in the store. He stood it up so that it was in its correct position, and frowned. The individual boxes formed by the shelves and dividers weren’t square! Instead, they seemed to be tilted at a slight angle. 

Kurt frowned and put his hands on his hips. “Shit!” he said out loud.

*****  
Blaine finished the dinner prep while Kurt was still working on the shelf unit, and decided to stay out of his way. He had taken his iPad to the table and was checking Facebook when he heard Kurt curse. “What’s wrong?” he called as he stood up.

“I don’t understand it,” Kurt complained as Blaine entered the room. “I know I did it right. But it’s not square. Look at it!”

Blaine nodded. “What do you want to do?”

Kurt shook his head stubbornly. “I’m going to take it apart and do it again, and this time, I’ll keep an eye on the angle where the shelves and dividers join. But I thought I was done, and I was looking forward to sitting down to eat with you.”

“Why don’t I stay and help? It might go faster.”

“Thank you. But the shelf unit and I are having relationship issues, and we need to work it out between the two of us.”

Blaine rolled his eyes, knowing this had the potential to end badly. “Okay, but we’re doing it together if it goes to round three.”

“It had better not,” Kurt muttered darkly.

Blaine turned to leave their bedroom just as Kurt’s phone went off. “Crap,” said Kurt, recognizing the ring tone. “That’s Dad. Would you get it? I can’t talk to him right now. Tell him I’ll call back after dinner.”

“Okay.” Blaine grabbed the phone off their dresser and swiped the screen as he left the bedroom. “Hi, Burt. It’s Blaine. Is everything okay?”

“Hi, kid. We’re fine. Just wanted to touch base with Kurt. We didn’t really talk very long last weekend.”

“He said to tell you he’d call you back after dinner. We were out most of the day, so we’re eating in tonight, taking it easy.”

“Do anything exciting?”

“We bought a new shelf unit for the bedroom at Ikea. Kurt’s busy putting it together.”

“Is he letting you help?”

Blaine grinned. “Nope.”

Burt chuckled. “I know my son. I’ll bet you anything he’ll tell you that he and I used to take cars apart and put them back together all the time, so he can do it by himself.”

Blaine laughed out loud. “Save your money, Burt. He already said it.”

But laughed with him. “See? What did I tell you?!”

Just then, Kurt shouted “Fuck!” very loudly.

“Uh, Burt, I think I’d better go see if I can help Kurt.”

“Okay, but be careful. Approach him slowly, like you would an animal that’s cornered. He might bare his teeth at you.”

“Good advice. Gotta go.”

“See ya, kid. Good luck.”

Blaine hurried into the bedroom. Kurt had his hands on his hips again, and the shelf unit looked very much like the last time Blaine had seen it.

“Hey,” Blaine said cautiously.

“I’m very pissed.”

“I can tell.”

“Look at it!!”

Blaine did. “It’s still not square.”

“No shit, Sherlock!”

Blaine slowly let out a breath. “I should probably leave you alone. But I’m going to get my iPad. I want us to watch the video I found. Maybe it will help.”

Kurt shook his head. “I just don’t get it. All the parts are here, and as far as I can tell, everything is cut correctly. So why is it giving me fits???”

Blaine pulled Kurt into a hug. “I don’t know, baby. But we’re going to figure it out. I’ll be right back.” Blaine kissed Kurt on the cheek, and hurried out of the room to grab his iPad.

“Okay,” Blaine said as he returned, sitting down on the floor with his back against their bed, and pulling Kurt down next to him. “Let’s watch.”

Kurt stared intently at the screen. “I swear he’s doing it exactly the way I did!”

“Shh,” Blaine replied. “Keep watching.” 

The video was almost finished when Kurt grabbed Blaine’s arm. “Wait.” Blaine paused it.

“What?”

“Just now, after he tightened the screws on the top panel and side panel, He went back to the bottom panel and the other side panel and tightened the screws there. That means he didn’t tighten them all the way when he started.”

“And?”

Kurt let out a breath. “But I did! Maybe if I keep those loose until I’m all done, and then tighten the four top and four bottom screws at the same time, it’ll work!”

“Let’s do it!”

Using the hex key, Kurt loosened each of the screws in the top and bottom panels. With Blaine’s help, he gently pushed on the pieces to make them square, and grinned as they seemed to move into place. “Oh my god, it’s working!”

Kurt tightened each of the screws halfway, and checked again to be sure everything was still square. Blaine held the unit in place while Kurt tightened the screws again until they were all flush with the panels. He stepped back to survey his work.

“I don’t have a level to be sure, but this looks pretty good to me.”

With Blaine’s help, they positioned the unit against the wall. Blaine pulled Kurt into a hug. “I think it looks great.”

Kurt nuzzled Blaine’s neck. “I love you, husband. Thank you for finding the video for me. I’m sorry I was such a bitch.”

Blaine bit his lip and said nothing.

“You’re not disagreeing.”

Blaine tightened his hold on Kurt and kissed him on the cheek. “Nope.” He pulled away so that Kurt could see he was smiling. “That’s why it’s a good thing we’re married. A less committed relationship would not have survived this experience.”

Kurt laughed. “I know! Look how we’ve grown as a couple!”

Blaine reached for Kurt’s hand. “Ready for dinner?” he asked.

“Definitely,” Kurt replied. “Oh, what did Dad want?”

“Just wanted to catch up. I told him you’d call him back after dinner.”

“Okay.”

“He also gave me strategies for what to do if you got angry while putting the unit together.”

“Oh he did, did he?”

Blaine smirked. “Just that I should be cautious. He also correctly predicted that you would tell me how he and you used to take cars apart and put them together.” 

Kurt laughed. “He knows me too well. After I call Dad back, do you want to put things on the shelves?”

Blaine turned to capture Kurt’s face in his hands, and gave him a slow, thorough kiss before pulling back. “Let’s do that tomorrow. I want us to spend tonight being rewarded.”

Kurt look puzzled for a moment, but then broke into a smile. “That’s right! I promised a demonstration.”

Blaine waggled his eyebrows. “I’m looking forward to it.”

**Author's Note:**

> Your comments are important to me. I would love to hear from you!
> 
> [ Link to Ikea Brooklyn ](http://www.ikea.com/us/en/store/brooklyn) (Yes, there really is an Ikea in Red Hook, Brooklyn)
> 
> [ Link to Defonte’s Sandwich Shop. ](https://www.tripadvisor.com/Restaurant_Review-g60827-d2256334-Reviews-Defonte_s_Sandwich_Shop-Brooklyn_New_York.html) I’ve never been there, but the reviews are excellent.
> 
> [ Accessible information for the NYC MTA subway system](http://web.mta.info/accessibility/stations.htm)
> 
> Video: [ Watch me build an Ikea bookshelf ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cNt3tdTerQ8)


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